I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
