Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Randomize
