I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
