I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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