But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Sext me about skeletons
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
