I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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