R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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