i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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