I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
