Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I will be naked everywhere
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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