We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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