Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
