my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Randomize
