Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Randomize
