how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
