So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
i barfeds in our rink
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize