This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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