Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
