i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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