i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
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