if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
