Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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