My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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