We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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