The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
we should paint friendship bongs
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