The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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