The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
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