Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Randomize
