Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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