how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
