Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
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