It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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