So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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