Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
