Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize
