He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
