google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Need sex. Gaining weight.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
How naked do you want me to be?
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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