i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
