She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
