she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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