i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Drunk walkin through police station. America
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
