5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
