we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Randomize
