yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize