we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
