that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
