Do vagina's smell?
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
i came on her dog
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize