We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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