My nipple is on Facebook.
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
The power of my boobs compel you
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
