Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
