I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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